Red flags and massages

Today was a resort-only day.

I was too late to catch the sunrise on the beach, but saw movement at the gym. Could not understand as I dont remember gym hours starting at 7. Nothing except for breakfast starts at 7 in Cuba, but thought now’s as good a time as any…

When I walked in I realised that despite my keycard opening the facilty it is deserted – no towels, no water, no staff. A check outside confirmed – gym hours start at 9 until 6pm. There is Out of Service Post-its on the two treadmills… just my luck, the only item I was actually interested in. Decided to spend some time on the stairclimber, seeing that I’m here and dressed up. 

A guy came in and basically made the same realisation I had – he also wanted to use the treadmills, but settled for the spinning bike instead. We specualted about the validity of the Post-its – I suspected its a rouse to stop ‘rogue’ users like us messing with the machines and hurting ourselves – too much alcohol available on site and everyone with a keycard can access 24 hours – can see the method behind the madness. 

Following a shower and breakfast I spent the morning reading at the lobby bar – alternating between champagne, coffee con leche and sparkling water. Had at house special coffee – the description “our little gem”. The last option under speciality coffees (i.e. the alcoholic options) In a champagne glass, with a serviette tux this ultra potent brew with a final hint of mint liquor is not to be trifled with. Besides the mint I tasted Khalua but there’s more in that than just those two…

When the sun came out stronger I felt guilty for hiding out in the shade and ventured to the beach to find out how to secure the use of a kayak, still on my bucket list for this trip. But no luck, the weather (clouds, rain and thunderstorms for pretty much the rest of the week) has improved, patches of warm sun, despite a rather chilly wind. However the only action on the beach was a group of brave souls joining an enthusiastic beach aerobic class. Red flag flying in the chilly wind basically proclaiming that any beach related activity besides walking at the waves edge (or apparently aerobics) is forbidden. So much for that, back to lobby bar  and champagne….

Which incidently is where I currently am, glass of bubbly in progress, after dinner, typing this!

Keeping I  mind that I had a 2:30pm hot stone massage booked I drank loads of fruit infused water to counteract the house coffee alcohol spike and had a very light lunch.

The last two questions on the form you fill in at the spa… Have you eaten anything in the past 2 hours? Have you had any alcohol in the past 4 hours? On this premesis (literally all inclusive 24 hour food and alcohol available) that’s a rather academic question…. It should rather be ” How MUCH have you…..”

The massage was an interesting experience, the 2nd time in my life I’d had a male therapist and the first one don’t count as he was as gay as you get. The first question when you book – are you ok with a male therapist? I guess it’s probably a little sexist, but considering the rather initimate nature of a massage per se, it’s just weird having a guy do it? I wonder how do guys feel about a male therapist? I’m not talking physiotherapist sports massage here, I’m talking the hot stone/aromatherapy “beauty salon” variety…. I know they generally don’t mind a lady…. 

Well it was very good, but he seemed to take personal affront towards every tense muscle… and in my case that’s 90% … that’s despite the alcohol and antidepressant. Dude, its REALLY not you, its me 🙃   I’m sure I’ll find a few blue bruises tomorrow morning…. he found tense muscles where I didn’t know I had muscles. 

Getting back to my room just as they were cleaning, so detour via the very popular home made ice cream station, luckily not 24 hours, only 12:00 to 18:00. Pistachio was my choice for today and it is excellent. Tonight with supper there was a coconut option, also very good, but a second scoop would be necessary for a final verdict, which I didn’t have.

Tried to read after a shower (I detest sticky stuff on my person – oils, sunblock, hair products, foundation on my face) They only stay for as long as really necessary. Reading didn’t go beyond two paragraphs as the after effects of the massage kicked in. Slept until after 19:30.

So, basically, besides supper and ending up at the lobby bar, that’s my day. A acoustic duo just started playing and the guy has a beautiful voice. ” ain’t no sunshine…. ” …. wonder how long before the other staple … “Stand by me” will make an cameo appearance ? I actually prefer the local spanish stuff, like despasito,  like he’s doing now, LOVE that song, despite the Bieber association 🤣 Apparently so does the batcholorette group and the one cleaner dancing with the mop! At least in Cuba the dancing is mostly a natural expression and not alcohol induced. Gotta love the Latin Americans. 

Signing off to “Tears in heaven” a favourite of one of the waitresses…. but guaranteed to make me cry…